Based on Jeff’s first pick-up line to me, it’s pretty unbelievable that we ended up together.
His friend Heather (and a picture of me) had finally convinced Jeff to meet me, so being the dutiful bible study leader that she was, Heather quickly fetched me from the depths of my homework and dragged me to her room to set my freshman self up with an older man.
When Heather and I entered her room, Jeff was sitting on the floor leaning against a closet door.
Matchmaker Tip #1: When introducing two people that you want to set up, please have both people standing up or both people sitting down. Otherwise it’s awkward. Really incredibly painfully awkward. I was a gangly, insecure college student that hated being tall, so as I looked down at this stranger sitting on the floor, I basically felt like a giantess towering over a new piece of man meat.
Except that I didn’t know that Jeff was supposed to be a new piece of man meat. In fact, I didn’t have the slightest clue as to why Heather had brought me to her room.
Matchmaker Tip #2: Make sure that the people you’re setting up, actually know that you’re setting them up. All I knew what that Heather had suddenly barged into my room, insisted that I meet someone, dragged me down the hall, propped me up in the middle of her room like a showpiece, said “Erin meet Jeff, Jeff meet Erin”, then sat down, crossed her legs, and left the rest up to fate…
There may as well have been a starting bell and one of those horse race announcers in the corner. “Aaaaaannd away they go….”
Matchmaker Tip #3: When introducing two future lovebirds, may I suggest leading off with an interesting conversation piece? Something they have in common, perhaps? Maybe a hobby? Or a mutual interest? SOMETHING.
But Heather didn’t give us anything. Nothing. Not a shred of information or reason as to why she was rather suddenly planting me in front of this guy. So after Heather’s lovely nonexistent introduction, a cloud of awkward silence began to descend upon us. Jeff panicked and lead off with the only thing he could think of…
“So I’m in a speech class with your friend Dale and he did a speech on rabbits.”
Rabbits. He lead with rabbits.
“Greeeeeeat…” I responded down to him. “Yeah, Dale never mentioned that. Sooooo I gotta finish some homework…”
And I left.
Only to be stalked by Mr. Jeff for the next two months…
(To be continued… This is just one part of the story of how Jeff and I fell in love. To read the entire series, start at the beginning here.)